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When I was contracted to train the stylists and staff in the Carlton Hair Group of hair salons in Johannesburg and Los Angeles, I asked the owner, Peter, what his biggest business headache was. You will be surprised what he revealed to me.

I was expecting things like cashflow, profit margins, hard to find good employees, low productivity / morale – the usual things I dealt with, but his answer was amazing. He said that his biggest problem was the boyfriends and live-in lovers of his female stylists. Most of them were unemployed, layabout parasites and leeches who kept demanding more “pocket money” (like little boys) from their girlfriends, the stylists. This distracted them at work, which affected profits, sales, and so on.

The biggest tapeworm found in a human body was 35 meters long.

I didn’t know there were men who lived off caring women until that time; I naively thought all men supported their women, whether they loved them enough to marry them or just lived with them. Not so – there are many useless men who take advantage of women: parasites plaguing producers.

Adult men who live at home with their parents for no good reason except for laziness and aimlessness are equally repugnant: their parents use up their hard earned savings / earnings that should be used in their old age on some deviant who takes advantage of their love.

I have found that there is, in many cases, justification for temporary help – there are always exceptions – but when it is a pattern or long term, it turns my stomach. A real man should support his family, or at least work hard in an attempt to do so, in my opinion.

Now here’s another scary thing. Most of these plunderers / tapeworms are posers: you will find them peacocking around in the smart clothes or cars bought for them by kind, well meaning women, talking the talk, pretending and posing and running their mouths. They seem to know more about everything than anyone else, yet they produce nothing.

These parasites play the Victim Game. Think of a triangle: on one corner is the Victim, on the second corner is the Rescuer, and on the third corner is the Persecutor. The Victim game works like this: If you help them, you’re a Rescuer. As soon as you stop helping them or you don’t give them everything they want, they see you as and accuse you of, being their Persecutor. There are only two ways out of this terrible triangle: either the so-called Victim starts taking responsibility for his (or her) life, or you leave the triangle and the relationship.

Producers don’t have to put up with parasites. Atlas can shrug if he wants to.

Robin Elliott LeverageAdvantage.com

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